Wedding planning can make even the most spiritually aligned people turn into complete sociopaths.
Like this bride-to-be (not pictured, definitely not Anne Hathaway from Bride Wars), who apparently demanded that her guests dress in bizarrely specific colorful outfits coordinated by their weight — and, after her dress code went viral, threatened to throw a â€œPolygraph Partyâ€� to determine which of her dear friends exposed her on social media.
In the now viral Facebook post, the unidentified woman shared with the guests to her 2019 Hawaii wedding a â€œvery specificâ€� dress code that she promised would â€œcreate an incredible visual effectâ€� and make their synchronized dancing on the beach â€œreally pop.â€� She added:
â€œRemember, the venue is extremely upscale, and we want to be looking our absolute BEST ladies and gentsplease, if you look like trash, so will we.â€�
She proceeded to detail a dress code that listed everything on the fashion spectrum, from Burberry scarves to… soda hats.
Per the post, women between 100 and 160 lbs. were instructed to wear a green velvet sweater, orange suede pants, a Burberry scarf and Christian Louboutin heels; women over 160 lbs., however, were to wear ALL BLACK.Â As for the men between 100 and 200 lbs., a purple â€œfuzzyâ€� jacket, a soda hat, black pants and glow sticks (?) would do; men who weighed more than 200 lbs. were to wear camouflage and black sneakers.
The post immediately went viral on Reddit, with users scratching their heads over what â€œincredible visual effectâ€� this couple was even trying to pull off.
To make matters more tragic and hilarious, the bride-to-be eventually caught wind of her dress code being mocked by the internet. She then, of course, proceeded to write a follow up message to her guests to let them know how â€œcrushed, betrayed, [and] saddenedâ€� she was.
She wrote that she would be hosting a â€œPolygraph Partyâ€� to find the social media â€œsnitchâ€� who betrayed her trust, adding that she and her fiance â€œbought a real polygraph test for $99 on Amazonâ€� and were determined to find â€œthe rat who did this.â€�
After the testing portion of the party, she said guests would be free to â€œcelebrate with drinks and appetizers.â€� Anyone who is unable to attend the Polygraph Party is naturally â€œpresumed guilty unless you can provide a valid excuse.â€� It’s also said she offered a $100 reward to anyone with intel on who might have snitched.
As for the social media snake, the bride-to-be claimed she would not retaliate — just â€œsimply cut all ties and communicationâ€� and sh*t talk them for eternity.
Later explaining why the dress code was so important, the woman reminded her guests that she and her fiance were â€œcertified spiritual healersâ€� and that each color represented a belief they held dear to their hearts.
The black and camo outfits she assigned the plus size guests to wear, for example, â€œrepresents the aura of the devil that we must shoo away.â€� She allegedly said that beliefs like these — fatter people being the devil — were as sacred as the traditions that one would see at â€œan Indian personâ€™s wedding.â€�
These remarks are so ridiculous, weâ€™re honestly not sure if itâ€™s some comedic genius portraying a bridezilla or the real deal. If it is realâ€¦ we can only pray one of the guests is brave enough to post pics from this wedding.
P.S. Here’s a meme that’s going around because of it:
[Image via YouTube/20th Century Fox.]