Why Lea Michele Has NEVER Seen Cory Monteith’s Glee Tribute Episode — And Doesn’t Plan On It!

Lea Michele recently recalled filming the very emotional Cory Monteith Glee tribute episode, The Quarterback, and we were NOT prepared to be crying this hard on a Tuesday!!!

Last Wednesday, the singer kicked off her tour, An Evening With Lea Michele: Life in Music, in Washington DC. Her return to the stage was already emotional enough for her fans, but she cranked it up a notch when she reflected on the loss of her boyfriend and Glee co-star in now-viral videos.

As Perezcious readers know, the actor tragically died on July 13, 2013, of combined heroin and alcohol toxicity at just 31. He and Lea met in 2009 on the set of the FOX musical dramedy and confirmed their relationship three years later. They were dating at the time of his death, and their on-screen characters Rachel Berry and Finn Hudson had been the series’ main relationship. The third episode of season 5, titled The Quarterback, paid tribute to their fallen star, during which Lea sang a teary-eyed rendition of Make You Feel My Love.

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Before performing the song for fans at her concert, Lea revealed that Glee creator Ryan Murphy allowed her to choose whatever song felt appropriate for the devastating moment — and it was a very tough decision. Getting choked up, she recalled:

“How can I pick a song that just says everything? I was just like, what could it be? I don’t even remember what I was listening to at the time. Like, nothing. I was just in such a hole. I’m grateful that [Murphy] asked me. I really, really am. Because it needed to be something that felt real for me. But it was also so hard to just think of what song, what could it be? And then I was just immediately like, ‘Oh, that’s it.’”

The future star of Funny Girl went on to share that the song was meaningful to her and Cory having listened to it at least one time together — as memory recalls, it was a particularly sweet memory of hearing it in the car while they took cover from the rain. Many other moments of the tough episode were also inspired by her real life, she continued:

“A lot of what I say to [Matthew Morrison‘s] character in that classroom were exact words I said to Ryan after everything. I said I don’t want to be treated with kid gloves. I want to just come back to work and be with everyone. Because this is the only way I’m gonna feel better.”

The strength it takes to get through a scene like that while facing all those emotions IRL is so impressive.

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While filming the episode was “wild and hard,” it was also a healing process for her, the Scream Queens alum continued:

“I got to sing this song. I remember filming it. It was really hard. It’s really hard. We would film it and then I would run off, and then I would come back. And it was wild and hard. But we healed together. And this song helped.”

Despite having so much control over the episode, she’s never brought herself to watch the poignant hour of TV, the 35-year-old revealed:

“It’s the only one I’ve not seen. Because I think if I don’t watch it, it just kind of feels like Finn is still there. So this [song] is very special.”

Aww! Hear her full explanation (below).

So heartbreaking.

Lea has since married Zandy Reich with whom she shares 1-year-old Ever Leo Reich. Every year on the anniversary of Cory’s death, she makes sure to honor him. This year, she took to her Instagram Story with a throwback photo of the former couple smiling and standing side by side on the set of their hit show.

To feel ALL the feels, listen to her full performance (below):

@katie.mikityuk

Didnt know i needed to hear this live until today. Little me is living! #leamichele #coreymonteith #quarterbackepisode #glee #live

♬ original sound – katie.mikityuk

Whoa! Beautiful! Reactions, Perezcious readers?!

[Image via Brian To/MEGA/WENN]

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