Madonna spoke very candidly about being hospitalized with a serious bacterial infection earlier this year during the opening night of her Celebration Tour.

In the midst of rehearsing for the world tour back in June, Madonna developed a serious bacterial infection and was treated in the hospital.

The illness led to her tour being delayed, and it started on Saturday (October 14) in London, England. While onstage, Madonna admitted that there was a time when she thought she might die. She also revealed what ultimately helped “save” her.

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“I didn’t think I was gonna make it,” Madonna said, via Billboard. “I forgot five days of my life — or death, I didn’t really know where I was.”

She continued, saying that she found strength from and for her children. “But my children were there — and my children always save me every time,” she said, adding, “I have got to be there for my children – I have to survive for them.”

Madonna is mom to Lourdes, Rocco, David, Mercy, Estere and Stella.

Check out the setlist from opening night of Madonna‘s tour here.