A few weeks ago, the 90 Day Fiance Season 10 trailer introduced fans to the cast — including Nikki and Justin.
Justin is a Moldovan man. He and Nikki met, fell in love, but then broke up many years ago.
They only recently reconnected. Nikki is transgender, and Justin rejected her many years ago. He has learned and grown a lot since then.
In this sneak peek video ahead of the Season 10 premiere, Nikki shares their backstory. And we’ve never heard of a coming out like this.
90 Day Fiance will premiere its tenth season on Sunday, October 8.
Nikki and Justin are one of the couples. After 15 years apart, they’re giving romance another shot.
We knew that Justin had ultimately rejected Nikki all of those years ago after she came out to him as transgender. In the sneak peek video below, we hear the full (bonkers) context for that.
47-year-old Nikki tells her friend and the camera about when she underwent bottom surgery when she was 20.
Not all trans folks undergo surgery, or the same surgery. Just like how not all cisgender women get breast implants, for example.
Still, as a young trans woman, Nikki was “stealth,” meaning that no one in her life knew that she was trans. She was, she explains to the camera, going through some things.
It turns out that, during an argument, Nikki simply blurted out: “I used to be a man.”
Not how many trans folks would come out, but that was what Nikki told Justin during a debate over (apparently) him not helping out around the house.
“I traumatized him,” she characterizes to a friend.
“And he went home and he was depressed for a really long time,” Nikki describes.
“And,” she expresses, “I felt bad about that.”
Coming out during a fight is rarely the right way to do it. But … it sounds like most of his reaction is on him.
15 years ago, Nikki explains, she and Justin parted ways. They did keep in touch, apparently.
Now, however, they recently realized that they were both single and have a lot more experience and wisdom under their belts.
So they decided, hey, what if they weren’t both single? What if they gave this another shot?
“Justin and I kept in touch throughout the years,” Nikki tells the camera.
“He had to go through things on his own,” she says. “And I had to go through things on my own.”
Nikki is clearly a very gracious and forgiving person.
They made plans to meet up and see if they could rekindle their old spark.
So Nikki planned a trip to Mexico. She went there from the US, and Justin went there from Moldova.
There, he told her that she was the love of his life. Following that confession, he proposed. And so they began the K-1 visa process. Second time’s the charm?
Infamously, YouTube comments are hives of scum and villainy. Long before the true rise of social media, this was common knowledge.
Sadly, during the first hours after Entertainment Tonight posted the above video, that showed itself to be true.
In addition to more (sadly) common outbursts of transphobic vitriol, some commenters blasted Nikki for not coming out to Justin the moment that they met. Some even suggested that there should be laws against … whatever they think that she did wrong.
Let’s be clear: the key to a happy and healthy relationship usually involves a lot of honesty. Holding something back should be a rare occurrence, and something that you do for a partner’s sake.
But we don’t pass laws based upon what makes the healthiest relationship.
More importantly, there are only a handful of things that people must disclose to a partner. Most of those involve potential dangers, like an STI or age. Even then, there are limits.
Cisgender people do not have to announce to the world that they are cis. Transgender people do not have to announce to the world that they are trans.
And something very relevant is that, unfortunately, trans women specifically face alarming rates of partner violence and even homicide.
Sometimes, abusers will seek out marginalized partners. Whether it’s by race, disability, gender, sexuality, or something else, they may feel that they can get away with more.
Fortunately, that was not Justin’s reaction. And perhaps, by the time that Nikki told him (in a fit of anger), she knew that.
But many trans folks are understandably fearful — of rejection, of violence, or even of less physical forms of reprisal — if they come out.
Yes, healthy partners communicate honestly. But someone’s safety always comes first.
To be honest, it sounds like their relationship was toxic for reasons that had nothing to do with one of them being trans and the other being cis.
There are cisgender couples where a woman expresses frustration because a guy isn’t helping out around the house.
Between the fights and Justin’s reaction to her coming out, clearly they needed to break up.
Perhaps Justin’s growth and maturity over the years means that he will be a better partner. Clearly, Nikki is hoping for that.
(Having only heard her side of things, it’s unclear what she might have to work on. Maybe we’ll find out when Justin shares his story)
Some of this franchise’s LGBTQ+ cast members have had stories that heavily feature their identities. Others have not. It will be interesting to see how things play out for these two.
Nikki Came Out to Justin in the WILDEST Way on 90 Day Fiance Season 10 was originally published on The Hollywood Gossip.