Last month, Becca Kufrin acknowledged that she doesn't know if she can remain engaged to Garrett Yrigoyen due to his outspoken bigotry.
Now, as hopeful fans chatter about rumors that they have broken up, Becca admits that she feels like this year is "testing" her in more ways than one.
"I mean 2020 for me personally," Becca begins on her podcast, "and I think for a lot of people in not only our country but our world."
Speaking of this cursed year, she says "it's testing us and there are so many different factors."
The COVID-19 pandemic. Millions of courageous protesters opposing racism. Oh, and it's an election year.
"COVID is still a thing," Becca acknowledges.
"And because everything else that's taking place is at the forefront," she admits, "sometimes I forget."
Becca continues: "like, ‘Oh, my God. We're living through a quarantine and this shutdown and people are dying.'"
"Like, there's so much going on in this year," Becca understates.
Looking back, she recalls how she "started 2020 on a high" in terms of her career.
"It was easy sailing," Becca reflects.
"And now I look back just to a couple of months ago," Becca continues.
"And," she states, "I feel like I was at a totally different place in my life,"
Becca explains that she was in "like, a completely different mindset."
"With everything happening," Becca expresses, "I feel like I'm being tested."
She notes that "I'm learning a lot more about myself and my friends and my family."
Becca says that she is opening her eyes "and just having new conversations that I've never had before in my life."
"And so yeah, good days, bad days," Becca says of her mental and emotional health.
"Thank god for [my dog] Minno because she keeps me sane," she expresses.
"She is like my therapy pet," Becca characterizes.
"You want to try to put on a brave face," Becca says regarding this year and various personal struggles.
"But I think I'm learning that that's not the case," she reveals.
Becca correctly affirms that "This is not the year to do that and to pretend everything's perfect."
"So just going through the motions" is sometimes the best that people can do, she acknowledges.
"Thank god I have a great support group and friends and family," Becca expresses.
We could all use emotional support as we deal with struggles -- from the pandemic to a potential messy breakup.
Becca acknowledges that she has been put through the wringer this year "but I'm learning a lot."
Learning a lot about important issues plaguing people different than herself, and why many people take issue with her engagement to Garrett.
"2020, it's been a lot," she emphasizes.
"But I look at it as, I would never want to not do 2020 for as many crazy things that have happened," Becca expresses.
She means that she is hopeful that a lot of positive change can come out of this year. We all do.
"So that's kind of where I am," she concludes.
Garrett marked the Black Lives Matter protests with an understated black square ... and then wrote a lengthy essay about his support for "Blue Lives."
Not only are there no such thing as "blue lives," but "Blue Lives Matter," like the similar racist dogwhistle "All Lives Matter," exists only to drown out Black Lives Matter.
That reminded Bachelorette fans of his even less subtle fondness for racism, homophobia, transphobia, and misogyny from his 2018 social media bigotry scandal.
Last month, Becca told fans: "For those who are curious about my relationship with Garrett at this point, all I can say right now is that I don't know,"
She admitted: "I can't give anything more than that. It's something that we are trying to work through and discuss and do work on at home at this time."
Becca was working on it at home "and that's where the work will remain and that's really the best I can give you at this point."
