Early this spring, Chrissy Teigen's history of vicious trolling resurfaced, and the backlash was intense.

Some good came of it -- like Chrissy's apologies to Courtney Stodden, whom she had bullied when they were a teenager.

But it has been jarring for many to realize that the "food lady who's surprisingly funny on Twitter for a mom" used to tell young celebrities to slit their wrists.

Chrissy is speaking about it now and offering a full apology and, for whatever it's worth, an explanation.

In January of 2011, Chrissy Teigen took aim at the infamously troubled Lindsay Lohan on Twitter.

"Lindsay adds a few more slits to her wrists when she sees Emma Stone," Chrissy tweeted at the time.

Twitter at the time was full of "edgy" humor, but mocking self-harm? And Lindsay was only one of many targets.

Anyone following Chrissy for well over the past half-decade has not seen that side of her.

She's a mother of two. She's John Legend's wife. She was targeted by QAnon monsters.

Even those of us who are always eager to put "edgy" jokes in context are at a loss to explain Chrissy's choices.

So, for weeks, Chrissy has been radio silent on social media.

She hasn't just been avoiding the inevitable backlash that comes whenever she tweets.

Chrissy has also, clearly, been doing some intense soul-searching.

On Monday, June 14, Chrissy Teigen returned to Twitter long enough to share a link.

The link was to a Medium post that Chrissy wrote.

"There is simply no excuse for my past horrible tweets," Chrissy affirmed.

"My targets didn’t deserve them," Chrissy acknowledged. "No one does."

"Many of them needed empathy, kindness, understanding and support," she noted.

Chrissy added: "Not my meanness masquerading as a kind of casual, edgy humor."

"I was a troll, full stop," Chrissy characterized.

"And," she continued, "I am so sorry."

Chrissy explained how she imagined that she was using "snark" to gain followers ... not realizing how awful she was.

"In reality, I was insecure, immature," Chrissy acknowledged.

"And," she continued, "in a world where I thought I needed to impress strangers to be accepted."

"If there was a pop culture pile-on, I took to Twitter," Chrissy described.

She used to tweet "to try to gain attention."

Chrissy continued: "And show off what I at the time believed was a crude, clever, harmless quip."

"I thought it made me cool and relatable if I poked fun at celebrities," she admitted.

"I wasn’t just attacking some random avatar," Chrissy expressed.

"But," she confessed, "hurting young women -- some who were still girls -- who had feelings."

In retrospect, Chrissy asked: "How could I not stop and think of that?"

"Why did I think there was some invisible psycho-celebrity formula," Chrissy asked.

One that "that prevents anyone with more followers from experiencing pain?"

Chrissy desparied: "How did I not realize my words were cruel?"

"What gave me the right to say these things?" Chrissy lamented.

"At the time, I just didn’t get it," she acknowledged.

"Believe me, I get it now," Chrissy affirmed.

"I’m telling you this for context," Chrissy clarified.

She emphasized that she is "not seeking or deserving any sympathy."

Chrissy correctly pointed out: "There’s no justification for my behavior."

"I’m not a victim here," Chrissy stressed, knowing that some cannot help but feel for her after seeing her get dogpiled on Twitter.

"The subjects of your sympathy -- and mine -- should be those I put down," she pointed out.

"The truth is, I’m no longer the person who wrote those horrible things," Chrissy noted.

"I grew up, got therapy, got married, had kids, got more therapy," Chrissy listed.

She continued: "Experienced loss and pain, got more therapy and experienced more life."

In all caps, Chrissy added: "AND GOT MORE THERAPY."

"Life has made me more empathetic," Chrissy explained.

"I’m more understanding of what motivates trolling," she shared.

Chrissy pointed to "the instant gratification that you get from lashing out and clapping back."

Chrissy characterized this as "throwing rocks at someone you think is invincible because they’re famous."

"Also, I know now how it feels to be on the receiving end of incredible vitriol," she grimly noted.

"Believe me," Chrissy assured, "the irony of this is not lost on me."

"It’s been a heavy few weeks," Chrissy acknowledged.

"So I’m going to take some more time to focus on things that are most important," she shared.

Chrissy detailed that she is focused upon "being with my family and taking care of myself."

"We are all more than our worst moments," Chrissy expressed.

"I won’t ask for your forgiveness," she vowed, "only your patience and tolerance."

Chrissy requested: "I ask that you allow me, as I promise to allow you, to own past mistakes and be given the opportunity to seek self improvement and change."